I used to be a slave to routines. For example, if a friend texted me to ask if I wanted to go on a hike, my knee-jerk reaction was to say I didn’t have time if it conflicted with my schedule.
I thought that was a good thing. I thought being able to stay on task was how I was going to advance and achieve what I wanted.
But I realize now I wasn’t entirely right about that. In an effort to be productive and plan everything out in advance, I was putting my life on autopilot.
Weeks would go by, and the days would blend together.
I knew what I was going to be doing every day of the week, almost down to the last precise detail. So instead of using routines to benefit me and give me more free time, I let routines run my life. What’s the point of that?
I’m starting to understand why elderly people look back on their lives and often comment on how quickly the years went by.
They just got stuck on the hamster wheel of life and didn’t even realize that everything they wanted out of life was passing them by. They were too busy focusing on their schedules to live, breathe, and enjoy the present moment.
Here’s what I’ve realized:
Whether we’re stuck in a windowless office 40 hours a week, waiting for 5 pm to go home and watch Netflix, or whether we’re hiking through Europe on some wild, spontaneous adventure, the clock will continue to tick by.
That means our everyday choices have a more significant impact on us than we realize.
Are your routines serving you?
To understand if your routines are helpful, be aware of why you have them in the first place. Do they exist to give you more free time, or do they stop you from having free time?
Being disciplined enough to do what needs to be done is a good thing.
Really — it is.
But if you discover that you’re not allowing yourself to live the life you want because your schedule doesn’t allow for it, that’s something to think about.
Is this how you want to spend your life?
I used to be terrified of the idea of throwing routines out the window and doing what I want in life.
But now I’m more afraid that I’ll get sucked into doing what everyone else is doing. I’m scared of getting a mediocre job and a mediocre relationship and living in a mediocre house in mediocreville.
I’m scared that the pressure to live up to other people’s expectations will crush my plans and hopes for the future.
I don’t want that. I bet you don’t, either. I’d rather do what fills me with joy, no matter what that is, than be a slave to routine and live with regrets. Wouldn’t you?
Leave time for the unexpected
Routines can be helpful — I won’t deny it. The control freak in me likes planning things out; I think that’s why I became so attached to routines when I was in college.
Routines are comforting. They’re a constant in an ever-changing world.
But if you start realizing, like I did, that you’re sacrificing your days (and therefore, your life) checking off endless to-do lists, maybe you should loosen up your schedule.
Today, I did something I was not planning to do — I went for a long drive. It had been so long since I took the time to drive somewhere on my own, and I needed to clear my head.
Luckily, I live in a beautiful area with natural beauty galore.
I ended up driving to a lighthouse, sitting on a stone bench, and listening to the waves gently break over the pebbles on the beach.
The sun was still high enough that I was able to soak up a few rays of sunshine before the wind prompted me to retreat back to my car.
In short, it was magical. It felt so good to live in the moment without a plan, even for just a few minutes.
Botton line
Here’s my advice: allow for the unknown. Break the rules. Mix things up. Do something you never do usually — something that isn’t part of a routine at all.
I’ve found that it’s when we let go of what we think we should be doing and do more of what we want to be doing that we make memories we would never have otherwise.
Don’t be too busy to live.
This article first appeared on Medium.
